Gratitude and Joy!

This is how I would like to characterize and reflect Life - with Gratitude and Joy. Gratitude is a wonderful gift to give to those who come our way, and Joy follows it quite naturally. Others may argue that Joy comes first, but to me, it seems to make more sense that the former is at least half a step ahead.

To live with both is truly how to live. I weave it in my moments, sometimes with ease, sometimes with more effort. My practice is the precise barometer that measures where I am...like tonight.

But enough of me. Dear GK is back in Manila!

Gratitude and Joy, indeed!

Catching Rays of Random Thoughts

I believe everything turns out to be perfectly orchestrated. In the midst of our destiny, we somehow manage to take the twists and turns into our own hands because we are gifted with an illusion of control, a leeway for choices - free will. We feel we have the capacity to make sense of the chaos but in truth, the chaos just shows that "Life is self-organizing" by design.

The art lies in understanding the timing, in drawing certain lines but knowing that they are never truly solid and defined, in recognizing the distinction of when to ride on the momentum of destiny or when to slow down and mitigate or soften the impact if fate is not in your favor. All the while reminding ourselves that we did not do the orchestration.

We can only really do so much. It is not all in our hands. Our will is so infinitisemally small compared to the grand design of the Creator.

We must use the gift of our small actions to manage the velocity of events in our lives but without worry because ultimately, the outcome is beyond our limited understanding. So we live and breathe and be. We understand our true purpose is to fully live, give, receive and return to Our Source. This is just a journey to understand that the destination is to go back Home. We are blessed with the gift of travelling through Life, a chance to navigate within and around us with abilities to feel, breathe in and love the moments as they are given.

Tweedle Numb (from my) Tweedle D...

I loved my practice this morning at Yoga Manila. I was running late for mysore though, and I had to cut my Savasana short because it was time for the next class so I did a few Sitali breaths in Padmasana.

A first this week was my hands touching down in Prasarita Padottanasana C. I was able to make it again today (thanks to Avril, last Tuesday and to Jon, today).

Another first is the numbness that enveloped my entire left arm as we were working on my Urdvha D. I still don't have the normal feeling in my entire left arm, down to the fingertips. I may have pinched a nerve somewhere. There's a layer of numbness in my arm and little pins and needles on the pads of my fingers. At least the floaty feeling is gone (my forearm kept floating up...)

We're working on the spaces (the final spaces?) to allow me to open myself up completely in my favorite pose.

It's the middle of a hot Saturday afternoon. Grocery shopping is done and I made my mushroom cream penne pasta for late lunch. Next time, I will add a drizzle of truffle oil.

Now, to go back to The Palace of Illusions...

P.S. Oh, GK's boracay retreat got cancelled. Was this my sweet Ganesha's answer?
P.P.S. (a few minutes later) but he'll be here this month!! It is Ganesha's answer!!

G is for Ganesha, G is for Govinda

Hello, dearest Ganesha? It's me, Nature...

Govinda is coming to town weekend after next and I really want to go. But it's a four-day leave and an arm and a leg.

How do I go about this? Will you let me? Oh, please let me...

Vakratunda mahakaya...

Mats Ado About Nothing

But still...

Today,  I finally got my special fruit roll up mat. It takes up a few more tiles in my little practice space but I am happy to be on it.  

P.S. I still have my very first mat, a thin grey nike mat from 2001 that I bought from my very first beloved yoga teacher, Anna for P750. It's the mat I used for over 3 years of Hatha Vinyasa Flow. Then I got a purple generic yoga mat from Toby's. I alternated this with a thin blue Nike mat (that came with two blocks and a strap) for the Jagad and Hatha days. Last year, I got an adidas double sided mat that I wore out in YT after 30 days of practicing twice (sometimes 3 times) a day. I left it with Veronique who insisted it was still good. Then A. got me another double sided nike one for Christmas. It's almost worn out as well. A. and the kids still use the older mats.

Thoughts on a Sunday Night (March 7, 2010)

The day wound down nicely despite my never getting used to having another work week between me and my little boy. He had fun doing a video commentary of me practicing. I hadn't realized till much later on. It sounded a bit like the Crocodile Hunter videos...me being the crocodile. A. cooked his special vegetarian tempura that I love so much and we spent the afternoon lounging around in bed, playing hide and seek and well, teaching Yzzy to sit and say Om.

Yni still has his sty but it's getting better. By late afternoon, we rounded up the gang to hear mass. Sunday evenings are still painful for me after all this time. I was quiet on the way home. A. made us a bowl of salad for dinner then I went straight to my book. Edward Scissorhands was showing. I'm not yet half way through The Palace of Illusions but I truly am relishing the story. Chitra Banerjee Divakaruni is such a gifted storyteller and already I am feeling inspired to read the Gita again.

My reading time was set aside though. A. invited me for a Sunday night swim to wash away the sizzling afternoon. The water was cold at first but we both warmed up after a while. We were planning the next surf trip and just horsing around the pool, doing jump backs at the shallow side (now if only I can lift as easily without the water...)

It wasn't a starry night but we saw the Big Dipper. I loved the alone time with A.

Hmmm...now that this entry is almost done, it seems like this was more for the other blog. I do repeat certain stories in both. I wonder if it's sustainable to have two with intersecting stories. Or would they naturally merge into one. Maybe it doesn't matter.

Time to read a few more pages from the eyes of Panchaali. Tomorrow, another work week begins. Exhale, Inhale...

Oh, and the ten day countdown to 32 begins.

Saturday Simile: As Happy as Kurmasana

I practiced at Yoga Manila this morning. I was so happy in my Kurmasana and Supta Kurmasana. (Thanks, Jon!) Just like I am so happy to be in my little home on a Saturday. Playing with the kids and just being near my hubby and going through my books to read and thinking of what to make for dinner...

I made tofu pesto with two kinds of basil, handpicked from my little pots of herbs on the terrace, and, well, we ordered Jollibee for my big boy. I should really wean him from fast food.

But back to my Saturday Simile. It's not always easy to be home with chores and children and chants of hon and mom and what's for dinner. There are little (and sometimes, big) home made stresses on my back but my home is my happy place and Saturdays are family celebrations.

And so my asana of the day is an apt parallel.