Day 14 (Sept 3)

I love how we were given each other to clear the mists...


I few more days and I'll be leaving YT. This journey is something I truly needed. It has given me more clarity for the things I want to accomplish - and that is to pursue this path. I do not know yet how the corporate setting will fit, if at all. As an option, I would like to focus more on people's individual wellness. But I am truly ready to let all of that go so I can teach full time, travel and write. That's my purpose. I've known this even as a child.

Today, we had more people at the fire ceremony. I am happily completing this morning devotion. Paul asked me during one of the ceremonies if I went to church. I said yes. I told him I could not express my love and thankfulness enough to that Great One who we've claimed in various forms, from the view of our own very limited minds. For me, all the beautiful ceremonies, songs, praises, and chants would not be enough to express how deeply I love God.

Ishwara Pranidhana.

In practice today, something new has shifted. I was able to make better Chakrasanas and a longer headstand. I worked my way through the new poses and I feel the shifts are happening faster and faster. I was very energized after practice.

Last night, I dreamed of Paul and this morning he sat with Michelle and me. He asked if we've known each other before. No but it does seem like we've been friends for a very long time. Kindred, he says. Yes. Definitely. Paul knows about connections. He truly connects on the more subtle levels but today he seemed so tangible to us - just sharing everyday stories. We had a lot of laughter. He is a great teacher and his spending time with us outside of the shala for a shared meal is such a wonderful highlight.

Michelle and I swam in the sea during lunch time and tried to learn a few German phrases from 10-year old Luna, had coconut gelato and then went for our chanting and lecture. Then we had our steam and swim and sharing session with Amra. We got a whole plate of pineapple upside down cake and our Friday night drink - Watermelon juice! We talked of our plans and pains and cities and dreams.

Day 13 (Sept 2)

Fire ceremony. Ustrasana. Summer rolls. Talk with Jack on his last day on the story of the man needing a jack, my improvised Indian dance and a bunch of other things. Meeting Dorien. Swimming in the sea. Scoops of coffee and vanilla gelato. Chanting. Lecture. Friendships.

Amra...

Ivana...

Tricia...

Michelle and I...

Day 12 (Sept 1)

Yet another beautiful day. I enjoy seeing Paul on his motorbike for 2 seconds right before the fire ceremony. Cecille and I were talking about it. I say he looks very "rock star" on the bike (well, not really, but I like to say it. Paul in his Ganesh sando does not look like a Harley boy. At least according to my citta vrtti)

He should ride a really big bike, I say.
With flames, of course, says Cecille.
Like Puja on wheels! we say.

But all that funny conversation disappears like smoke as soon as Paul arrives.

It was Cecille's last day today and I will miss her. I like how her voice shadows Paul's as they chant in the fire ceremony. I like the care she puts in choosing the flowers for the ritual. I like the little conversations we have before Paul arrives - whether its about yoga, the cleverness of mosquitoes, or the case of disappearing dogs, Today, she left me a "vintage" copy of the chants, and for that, among other things (like her helping me in my practice), I am thankful.

I was getting ready to record the ceremony and we had a really good laugh because when I told her, she asked, How's my hair? It was really funny considering it was 6.15 in the morning and the mosquitoes were feasting on us. (Later that day, the file I recorded got corrupted though, much to my dismay. Must not get too upset about it...)

So for my practice, I did not feel the oatmeal tightness, thanks to only three spoons full of lentil soup the night before. My reward - Parsva Dhanurasana. 5 breaths on the right. Inhale up. 5 breaths on the left. Keep my head up. Inhale up. 5 breaths Dhanurasana.

After practice, came the much awaited brunch. I loved the falafel with tahini sauce, loved my coffee, too. Michelle and I decided to go back to the sea but just for a while. We got hungry fairly quickly so I had another serving of falafel and coffee. Then we went to the pool.

We had our usual chanting and lecture in the afternoon and I was able to talk with my boys during dinner time, right before our evening sing-along/bhajan (Jack's last night) and it ended on a high note (I got to play the tambourine! I love that!)

I really like this group of people. Oh. I hear the tone of that sentence. It's almost time to leave YT again. I have been standing for so long in this crossroad and I want to really make that leap of faith THIS YEAR. I feel it's time.

Day 11 (Aug 31)

I love the fire ceremony. I think it brings me the same effects of meditation. I like how the sound of the conch brings me to most present moment, the gifts of flowers, ghee, milk and honey, the sound of crackling as the herbs burn, and how the fire continues to dance even when my eyes are closed. Having started the morning beautifully though, I would like to report that my 2 day experiment is complete. My conclusion: No more carbs at night. No more. My hamstrings were extra tight this morning. I felt sluggish and my poses seemed to have the consistency of oatmeal (with chocolate chips). I did get some wonderful advice from Rachel this morning and I think I'm well on my way to jumping through and longer headstands.

Michelle and I decided to skip the sun, sand, and sea to save our shoulders from burning. I attended Sanskrit class and the chanting and lectures. During the break, I had two veggie brownies (Jack bought me one). I enjoyed the snack immensely! After the class, I went for a swim in the pool. It started to rain but the water was so warm. After a good swim, I stayed in the steam room and then had another dip in the pool, showered and went off to our evening chants with Jack. It was beautiful - Om Hrim Sri Laksmi Bhyo Namaha... The mantra was for removing mists and the harmony came to me rather easily and then Jack fused it with a Irish poem of the same purpose and it was very beautiful.

He then spoke about tantra and how Krishna gave dark chocolate as the answer to one of the questions on how happiness could be attained. I could not agree more. And of course, right before we chanted our last chant, we were given dark chocolate. So yes, Lokaah Samasta Sukhino Bhavantu.

* * *
By the way, for dinner, I only had three tablespoons of lentil soup. Let's see if I feel better during asana practice tomorrow morning....
* * *
Snippets (I was too engrossed to take down too many notes. I just like to let the words sink in):
The spinal column is where our consciousness sits.
Dreams are our memory's discharge.
What we need to do is be aware that we are functionally moving and witnessing at the same time.
If we keep this lesson, you can go on with our life without being tainted by life - you can be happy wherever you are.
On asana, asana practice is strenuous because it coordinates the mind, the physical body and emotions.
The posture, when practiced properly, will make you at ease in the posture (15 minutes in the asana to feel the curative benefits of the pose...)

Day 10 (Aug 30)

We started with the fire ceremony, chanting and meditation (this time with Surya Bhedan). My practice started very slowly though, I felt somewhat tired. I think it's from eating carbs in the evening (i.e., two small servings of brown rice soaked in green curry).

After practice, I had two servings of papaya, green leaves with shitake, and michelle's left over scrambled egg and pechay. I had lots of pineapple and chrysanthemum juice, too. And a cup of organic coffee. That's when we decided to go for a swim in the sea. The weather was perfect, the water warm on the surface but cool beneath. We were happily floating (I am very, very buoyant) and, like silly little yogis, did the poses in the shallow part of the water. Jump backs, jump throughs, Mayurasanas are effortless in the water. Then we decided to paddle out and pretend to catch some waves using Simone's inflatable raft.

Here I raised my tankini to tan the stretch marks on my tummy, looking at the sky also stretch marked with cirrus clouds. The macrocosm reflects the microcosm, so they say.

We paddled from the boundary of rocks and back and just let the sun, sand and sea have its merry way with us. We went back for coconuts and summer rolls (oh so deliciously made. Sitaw, lettuce, carrots, cucumber, mango and wansoy in light egg wrapper and sprinkled with black sesame seeds. It comes with this fantastic tamarind dip). Then we took a dip in the salt water pool before taking a shower and coming to our afternoon session to finish chanting the Samadhi Pada. Jayashree and Narasimha are so funny. They always argue in jest and we all get a good laugh.

We continued our talk on pramana, viparyaya, vikalpa, nidra and smrti.
On all our so-called knowledge, wrong perceptions, illusions, sleep and memory. I knew that dreams could be borne out of memory but I learned today that they can apparently ease us out of our karma. (I'll type up some notes next time...)

I write this with a happy sigh. Glorious day. Even as I am quite toasted and covered in coconut oil.

In the evening, I had a bit of salad, a bit of soup, a roll of buttered wheat bread. And five chocolate chip oatmeal cookies. Yes, five. They're not that big. Let your thumb touch your index finger. Jnana Mudra. There. Five of those. Energy locked in to keep me warm the whole night through. Let's see how I feel in the morning.

I have Jayashree singing in my head yet again...

Day 9 (Aug 29)

Pacasana. Kroucasana. Salabhasana A. Salabhasana B. Bhekasana. Dhanurasana.

Paul is an amazing teacher (amazingly funny, too). Hard core, he says as I blot the blood from a scrape on my left foot which I got from jumping not quite through. He did say to put band-aid though. When I finished the new pose, I looked at him for guidance. I say - What do we do now? And he says - Well, we could go for some coffee, blah, blah, blah. He lightens the otherwise uber serious uddiyanas in us. 

As he moves me lower into the seated poses, he sings Om Mane Padme Hum (a tribute to my tattoo) and to Michelle, he chants, Go Hanuman! (a tribute to hers)...

I also did a photoshoot for my room mate. This is her. Ivana.

After more chanting and a lecture on the Sutras, we had dinner and then our mini concert of chanting with Jack, Jayashree and Narasimha (who held the flashlight). It was beautiful, sweet. We encircled this.

Now to finally sleep.

Day 8 (Aug 28)

Today, I was initiated in to Reiki II. This was one of the things I wanted to do during these two weeks but I thought I would not be able to since no one could join me. I was not disappointed though. In this journey, I have learned that God's timing is perfect. As He would have it, this was possible afterall.

I received my attunement facing the sea in the outdoor shala. It was a lovely day for healing. Tonight I will sleep with the symbols encircling me.

This is beautiful Claudia (who also introduced me to Reiki I).